I want to apologize for all of the hurtful and painful things that have been said about people in the church that have been talented and gifted and musical, that we’ve used and we’ve embarrassed… and all this other horrible crap that we’ve done. We have not treated them like people. We’re talking about human beings, men and women that God has created.
The Bible is not a book that’s an attack on gay people. It’s not a book written to attack gay people. It is horrible that we have made it where The Bible is a homophobic manual. That’s not what The Bible is. I mean you want to talk about things that God gets at… pride and jealousy and envy and arrogance. But what we also see is God sending his son to save us all, because we were all… straight, gay or whatever, lost and in need of a savior, and there’s room at the cross for all of us.”
— Grammy-winning gospel artist Kirk Franklin in an interview withThe Grio
We’ve asked online comedian, voice actor and chest hair model Sam Kalidi to create a new meme each week for Queerty readers. This week he investigates the ongoing homophobia in less-evolved parts of the world. Sam looks forward to all your hate mail. You can find him on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram and at your local glory hole.
Two male lions Panthera leo lying side by side, Masai Mara National Reserve, Kenya
I didn’t want to be gay. I actually went to the doctor at one stage to see if I could be chemically castrated in any way, if it would get rid of me being gay. Looking back at that, it was a horrific thing that one would have to do, but that’s what I was going through at the time. It was only when my mom came to see me in hospital when I tried to take my own life and she told me: ‘If you try to do anything like this again, then you take me and Dad with you, because we don’t want to live our lives without you.’
I was an only child. I sat up in bed that night and I cried. I thought to myself that I need to grow up here. That’s when I accepted who I was, and that was the biggest challenge of my life over with. A lot of people are struggling with who they are. They can’t tell other people they’re gay because they’re fighting it themselves. That’s one of the reasons a lot of people are not out in sport yet.”
— Openly gay Welsh rugby referee Nigel Owens, who came out in 2007, talks candidly withCNNabout his struggle to come out
A young man recently wrote into advice columnist Pamela Stephenson Connolly at The Guardian seeking advice on a fetish that he fears will make others think he is a “disgusting freak.”
“I’m a gay man in my early 20s and, for as long as I can remember, my tastes have differed from the norm,” the letter begins. “I have a fetish for bigger guys and I’ve even wanted to gain weight myself to satisfy this.”
The letter continues: “I realize the stigma around obesity and its health implications, and my struggle with this has led me to hide myself away. I fear that others will see me as a disgusting freak.”
Of course, chubby chasing is nothing new. Lots of guys are attracted to heavier men and with good reason. A 2014 study found that guys with bigger bellies lasted an average of 7.3 minutes longer in the sack. And let’s not forget last summer’s “dad bod” phenomenon.
“Don’t let the zeitgeist spoil your pleasure,” Connolly, a psychotherapist who specialized in sexual disorders, replies. “You are fortunate that you do not need a ‘ripped’ partner in order to become aroused.”
“Body-worship is extremely common,” she continues. “It occurs in many forms, with a great deal of cultural variation, and is usually the result of tastes and triggers that begin to form quite normally in childhood. Despite the current fashion for preferring well-toned men, there are plenty of fleshier men around who would love to know that you desired them.”
Connolly goes on to say that being attracted bigger guys does not make a person a “disgusting freak.”
“Each of us has a unique design for arousal and sexual connection,” she concludes, “and yours is far from ‘freakish.’ Please yourself, and be proud.”
Gayle Newland, a 25-year-old woman from Willaston, Cheshire, has been sentenced to eight years in jail for tricking her friend into having sex by posing as a man.
For two years, she disguised both her voice and appearance, convincing her friend to wear a blindfold every time they met.
They had about 10 sexual encounters in all — until the time the complainant removed the mask and found that it was her friend Newland, wearing a prosthetic penis.
Judge Roger Dutton called Newland “an intelligent, obsessional, highly manipulative, deceitful, scheming and thoroughly determined young woman.”
Newland tried to argue that they were role playing; that her accuser knew she was in disguise and pretending to be male.
During the trial, she insisted that no blindfold was ever part of the performance, and denied strapping bandages to her chest to conceal her breasts.
The jury didn’t believe the story, and convicted her of three counts of sexual assault.
According to testimony, Newland cooked up a phony Facebook profile with the name “Kye Fortune,” taking on this persona by mimicking a man’s voice when speaking on the phone to her victim.
The reason “Kye Fortune” preferred she wear the blindfold? “He” was highly self-conscious about his looks because he was undergoing brain surgery.
Apparently, the two women spent over 100 hours together.
The complainant would even wear the blindfold while they watched television. Or sunbathed.
Judge Dutton said:
“To successfully pass off a deception of this complexity was a major undertaking, involving dedicated mobile phone lines as well as regular texts from you purporting to be Kye’s relatives. You pursued this course of conduct over a lengthy period, during which you played with her affections, acting entirely for your own sexual satisfaction and choosing to ignore the devastating impact that the eventual discovery of the truth would have on her.”
Newland cried out upon hearing the sentence, and had to be physically restrained by two police officers.
As she was escorted from the classroom, she cried out “Oh my God,” and could be heard screaming.
In the public gallery, friends and family stood in tears, and her father was visibly furious.
Dutton said the defendant had sent a series of emails to the complainant after the mask was removed, apologizing for her indiscretions.
“Your defense,” he said, “was that [the complainant] knew who you were from the outset and that this was just role play. Those apologies were because you knew the game was up and that your cruel deception had been discovered.”
The judge was convinced the psychological component of the case would have a grave and long-lasting effect on the complainant, calling Newland’s actions “a callous breach of the trust that your friend had in you.”
Newland’s disorders were identified in a psychiatric report: social anxiety disorder, a personality disorder, depression, and obsessive compulsive disorder.
Her council, Nigel Power QC, argued that all of these were closely linked with issues she had regarding her sexuality.
Her low self-esteem and “blurred gender lines” added to a “very troubling picture”, according to Dutton.
But, in the end, he concluded:
“These offenses are so serious that only an immediate custodial sentence would in any way properly reflect the serious nature of your conduct. As an aspect of mercy, I do not increase the starting point beyond eight years.”
Earlier this election season, Vitter’s camp allegedly threatened to pull $250,000 worth of advertising from a local TV station if it didn’t immediately fire a reporter who asked him if still enjoyed being dressed up in adult diapers and spanked by prostitutes, a charge Vitter admitted to back in 2007.
A few weeks after that, one of Vitter’s alleged former mistresses came forward to say she had given up his love child for adoption in 2000 after the pro-life, “family values” politician urged her to have an abortion.
For the most part, Vitter was able to talk his way out those scandals, usually by pivoting the blame onto others. That all changed, however, late last week when his opponent, Democratic state Rep. John Bel Edwards, released what may very well be one of the most brutal and simultaneously hilarious must-see political ads in history in which he accuses the senator of “choosing prostitutes over patriots”:
Vitter called the ad a low blow, though he didn’t actually deny what it said because, well, he couldn’t. He really did run off with a hooker at the same time he was supposed to be voting for a bill honoring U.S. soldiers. It’s all on record.
Well, this week, Vitter finally responded to that whole paying-women-for-sex thing that’s been plaguing like a bad case of herpes for the past eight years. In a glossy new 30-second TV spot, he tries spinning his sex scandal into a tale of redemption.
“Fifteen years ago, I failed my family,” he begins, “but found forgiveness and love. I learned that our falls don’t define us, but rather how we get up, accept responsibility and earn redemption.”
Then he tries comparing his “mistake” (paying for prostitutes while simultaneously claiming to be a “family guy” and opposing LGBTQ rights, women’s rights, etc.) to the problems of everyday, hardworking, law-abiding Louisianians.
“Now, Louisiana has fallen on hard times: budget crisis, low wages, failing schools,” he continues. “You know me: I’m a fighter. And as your governor, I’ll get up every day to fight for you for a much better, stronger Louisiana.”
Evidently, in Vitter’s eyes, not earning enough at your job to make ends meet or having your child bring home a bad grade from school is tantamount to being caught paying women for sex with a government-funded salary.
The video, which was originally titled “Hard Times” until several commenters pointed out the double entendre and it was changed to “Difficult Times,” was uploaded to Vitter’s official YouTube channel, but it can only be viewed through a direct link and does not appear anywhere on his channel’s main pages.
Vitter is currently losing to Edwards in the polls by 22 points. And with the election still two weeks away, we’re sure there’s going to be a lot more diaper-slinging.
Most parents throw parties and buy gifts for their sons and daughters when they get married. But not Pastor Kevin Swanson from Colorado. He’d rather smear cow manure all over his body then plop himself down in front of the church doors in protest.
While speaking at the National Religious Liberties Conference last weekend, Swanson told the crowd that he was totally, 100 percent “not kidding” when he said he’d smear poo all over himself if his son were ever to marry another man.
“There are families, we’re talking Christian families, pastors’ families, elders’ families from good, godly churches,” he preached. “Their sons are rebelling! Hanging out with homosexuals and getting married!”
“And,” he added with absolute horror, “the parents are invited!”
The statement was met with a collective gasp of shock from the audience.
“What would you do if that was the case?” Swanson continued. “Here is what I would do: Sackcloth and ashes at the entrance to the church and I’d sit in cow manure and I’d spread it all over my body. That’s what I would do and I’m not kidding! I’m not laughing!”
Swanson and friends may not have been laughing, but the rest of the world was.
Interpret Swanson’s cow manure statement however you please. We interpret it as him having a poop fetish. Although, we’re not sure how to interpret what came next in his antigay tirade, other than to call it a complete nervous breakdown on stage.
“I’m grieving!” Swanson screamed, tears of rage running down his cheeks. “I’m mourning! I’m pointing out the problem!”
“It’s not a gay time,” he continued, almost incoherently. “These are the people with the sores! The gaping sores! The sores that are pussy (sic) and gross and people are coming in and carving happy faces on the sores! That’s not a nice thing to do! Don’t you dare carve happy faces on open, pussy (sic) sores!”
We’d include the video but it appears Swanson’s team has since scrubbed it from the internet. Luckily, Rachel Maddow featured a few clips from it on her show earlier this week.
[Kim Davis is] the lady who makes me embarrassed to be from Kentucky. Don’t even say her name in this house… all those people holding their crucifixes, which may as well be pitchforks, thinking they’re fighting the good fight. I grew up in Kentucky. I know how they are. I was raised a Republican, but I just can’t imagine supporting a party that doesn’t support women’s basic rights. It’s 2015 and gay people can get married and we think that we’ve come so far, so, yay! But have we? I don’t want to stay quiet about that stuff.”
— Academy Award-winning actress Jennifer Lawrence discussing her fellow native Kentuckian, noted marriage equality opponent Kim Davis in an interview withVogue